Call me a bad bride, but I'm having a wedding identity crisis. When you're wedding planning, all anyone wants to talk about is your new last name (or the flowers you're using), and I don't know how early is too early to adopt my new monogram. I have over a year until my wedding, so should I hold off on wearing all "K" monogrammed items until closer to the big day?
I've never been a huge fan of three-letter monograms and usually rely on the classic cursive "L" for all of my personalized items. Like Cher or Rihanna, I tend to focus only on my first name and leave my last name behind. So, this is pretty new territory for me. When I first got engaged, my maid of honor sent me a beautiful gold necklace with my future monogram. I love it and wear it frequently, but feel like a fraud when I do so. It's like I'm borrowing someone else's necklace and that person happens to be responsible enough to maintain a home and cook a meal other than popcorn and Campbell's soup.
This internal crisis has been brewing since we got engaged, mainly because our engagement is so long. I'm not going to buy anything with my current monogram on it because that has a short shelf life. However, I worry that I look too 'wedding obsessed' if I deck myself out in wifey attire and take on my new last name a little too early. However, the entire thing came to a breaking point while planning a bridal shower for another friend of mine. We handed out champagne glasses with each guest's monogram as party favors, and one of my co-hosts asked me a simple question: Which letter do you want on your champagne glass?
HOLD UP STOP EVERYTHING. At least, that's what I said in my head. This was the first time I actually had to choose which monogram to use. Since I've already committed to spending the rest of my life with Aus and taking his last name, you would thing this wouldn't be such a hard decision. And really, it wasn't. I opted for the K, but it still feels odd to completely break away from my maiden name when I'm not married yet.
I don't think there are any set-in-stone rules about wearing accessories with your new monogram on them, which is good for me because it means I can make them up. A charm bracelet charm and smaller accessories with your new monogram are fine, just don't over do it. Avoid excessively buying items with your future monogram until closer to your wedding date. Save some of the excitement of a new monogram for after the wedding, when it's really yours.
Side note: Many sources claim that you shouldn't use a wedding monogram (your first initial + your fiance's first initial + your new last name) any earlier than your wedding reception (because by then you're actually married). With that logic in mind, I guess you technically shouldn't wear or use anything with your new monogram on it until after the wedding. However, I'm all for breaking rules, as long as it's in moderation.
Manners Moral: Embrace your future name, but don't take it too far. Enjoy your pre-marital identity because once you're married, you'll never get it back. This is probably too deep for a discussion about monograms, but hey, weddings can do that to a girl's brain.