I've been 25 for a little over a week, which means I've had plenty of time to reflect on the etiquette rules I want to master in the next year. To me, 25 seems like such an "adult" age. I'm no longer in my early twenties. I'm getting married, buying a home and in the midst of my third year in the professional work force. It's about time that I master these things and start to get my life in order.
Think of it this way, instead of setting New Year's Resolutions, I'm setting New Age Resolutions.
Office Etiquette
- Stop working on other things during meetings: I'm bad about this. Call it my Type A personality needing to multi-task or my undiagnosed ADD. Either way, if I'm in a meeting with my laptop, there's a 99% chance I'm checking e-mail, reviewing spreadsheets or researching different venues. However, working on other projects during a meeting is unproductive (for the meeting itself) and extremely rude.
- Try to keep my cube area clean and organized: Currently on my desk are leftover birthday decorations, miscellaneous pages with scribbled notes, 14 different pens, birthday gift baubles, an unidentified sucker (still wrapped don't worry) and a variety of other knick-knacks. My mom always taught me to keep my room clean, and since I spend eight hours at my desk, I should give it the same respect.
- Make sure I'm always on time: No discussion or witty statements required here. Being on time to work, or anything in life, is extremely important. I try to cram a lot into my mornings, but I need to make the effort to arrive on time. And remember, being on time actually means being a few minutes early.
- Take notes and file them away: I always take notes during meetings. I think it's vital to come into every meeting with a notepad and pen. However, what do I do with these notes? Usually, I see them as to-do lists and throw them out once all the tasks are complete. However, a lot of the time, these notes encompass larger ideas that keep coming up in future meetings. I need to set up a solid note-filing system so that I always have access to my records and can sound informed.
- Redefine casual business attire: I'm not trying to give myself excessive praise, but I feel like I am already pretty successful at this. In an office environment where t-shirts, flip-flops and jeans are allowed (and the norm for that matter), I stick to nice dresses, jeans with heels and fashionable tops. Now that I'm older, I want to continue to wear professional items to the office and even amp it up. You won't see me in a suit, but I may stop wearing the things I purchased for my college internship.
Office baubles increase productivity and happiness, which is really all you need for great work etiquette
Wedding Related
- Finish the registry: Aus completely disagrees with me on this, but the wedding registry is a huge part of being a great bride. You need to register for things that you want and need while also making sure you have enough gifts to go around. Most people are going to want to buy off of your registry just to give you something you want. However, you also want to provide enough unique gifts to satisfy the people who don't just want to get you another place setting. I need to get my registry wrapped up ASAP.
- Learn how to cook: So, this isn't directly related to the wedding, but learning how to cook is a huge part of my life as a wife. I need to know how to work appliances and make meals that don't just involve cereal bowls and Keurigs in order to actually utilize all of the great items I have in my registry. I don't quite know who I will use as my chef inspiration or which meals I'll tackle first, but I know it is definitely something I will accomplish before I'm 26.
- Find some quality thank-you notes: Writing timely thank-you notes is a HUGE part of being a great bride. Some people will tell you that you have up to a year after your wedding to send thank-you notes, but this is so wrong. As soon as you get a gift, including shower and engagement gifts, write your notes. It will get a huge task out of the way and will also show the gift giver that you really appreciate their present. Right now, I am on the lookout for thank-you cards that mimic my wedding colors, look bridal and aren't cheesy.
- Prep for wedding showers: Bridal showers aren't all fun and games. Hear me out on this one. It's actually hard to be a bride at a shower. Yes, people are celebrating you and giving you gifts, but in return, you have to be 100% on your game, interact with your great aunt and best friend and smile lovingly at every gift, even if you have no idea what it is or how you'll use it. Showers are a blessing and a curse, especially for someone like me who is pretty unfamiliar with household (i.e. Kitchen) items.
- Be the perfect bridesmaid: While I'm 25, I will be a bridesmaid in at least one wedding, with the possibility of being in another. That means I need to step up my bridesmaid game at the same time I'm stepping up my bride game. I'm taking notes on everything I want as a bride and applying it to my role as a bridesmaid. After all, bridezilla or no, it's all about the bride on her special day.
Wedding gifts mean lots and lots of thank-you notes
Style & Fashion
- Invest in more timeless pieces: My style is not timeless. My eye is immediately caught by a Kate Spade novelty purse and tends to look past the timeless black leather options. For someone on the verge of adulthood, this isn't a great quality. Yes, I want to be known as someone with a unique style, but I also want people to think I have taste. This probably isn't going to be a complete turnaround, but for every novelty item I buy, I'll go ahead and purchase two timeless pieces. That seems fair.
- Invest in some decent casual clothes: For the most part, my closet consists of two main types of clothing: (1) Outfits appropriate for work/dinner/nice events/etc. and (2) Nike shorts and t-shirts. I need to look into some casual outfits that are fit for running to the grocery store or grabbing a quick Saturday lunch with Aus. People at my age shouldn't still be wearing college t-shirts all weekend.
- Keep my closet organized: As a woman, it's very easy to accumulate an obscene amount of clothing, shoes and accessories. This is definitely the case with me, which means my closet can be a little chaotic. I need to make sure everything is nicely hung in my closet, items are neatly folded and my accessories are stored appropriately. A great wardrobe means nothing if it isn't properly taken care of by the wearer.
- Take off one piece of jewelry: Coco Chanel said, "Before you leave the house, look in the mirror and remove one accessory." I'm definitely an overaccessorizer (it's a real thing) and need to start following this advice. Instead of three bangles on one arm and a loaded-down charm bracelet on the other, I should probably only go with one arm at a time. I'm not going to completely revamp my loud and obnoxious accessories. I just won't wear them all at once.
- Get my nails done more often: Does anyone else feel like they have their life together when their nails are done? I get my done about four times a year (usually for the holidays or when I'm in a wedding), but I need to start going more often (or learn to do it myself). Done nails tie together an entire look and show people that you care about your appearance.
I know that I should be buying more timeless pieces, but who can turn down a Kate Spade purse that looks like an owl?
Communication & Relationships
- Stop texting at the table: You may have already read my post on the acceptable reasons to use your phone at the table, but if you haven't, here's a quick tip: Don't use your phone at the table unless it is an absolute emergency. If I'm at lunch, I'm checking emails, and if I'm at dinner, then I'm looking at other text messages. True adults should keep their phones off the table and focus on their in-person company, which is what I plan to do in the coming year.
- Stop being so sarcastic: This is going to be the hardest one for me by far. Sarcasm is pretty much the basis of my life, if you can't tell from this blog. As a true adult, I need to incorporate seriousness into more of my daily conversations. My friends who can handle it will still get their daily sarcasm, but I'm going to attempt to keep it out of the workplace.
- Don't text while talking to other people: I am really bad at texting and talking at the same time. I will text what I mean to say out loud, and say out loud what I mean to text, which can get especially awkward if I'm throwing some shade. I do this because I am trying to multi-task and get things done, but I need to focus on one person at a time and give them my undivided attention. I expect that from others, so it's only fair.
- Start correctly responding to thank you: Did you know that when people say "thank you," the only appropriate response is "you're welcome." I'm a big offender in this regard and usually respond with a "no problem" or "sure thing." If someone takes the time to thank me, then I should acknowledge it with a simple, "you're welcome." It's an easy change, but one that needs to happen.
- Be a better long distance friend: I always harp on the fact that I am a horrible long-distance friend. I don't reach out to my out-of-town friends enough and rarely check in on their lives. I've heard that as you get older, the quality of friends matters more than quantity (this should be true regardless of your age), so I want to make an effort to touch base with my pals and continue forming strong bonds. All it takes is a simple text message.
Thank you is a phrase that everyone needs to learn, whether you say it face-to-face or in a personalized note.
Social Butterfly
- Make a home conducive for entertaining: This etiquette rule requires that we actually purchase a home in which to entertain people, but I believe that's in the very foreseeable future. In order to make a home that makes sense for entertaining, we need to have an open concept (bet you've never heard that on HGTV before), indoor and outdoor living areas and a comfortable yet elegant style. Stay tuned on how I make this work, but trust me when I say it will be quite the adventure.
- Follow a theme or color: I have always loved a theme party, whether it be a true costume event or just a certain color. In the coming years, I want to make sure I continue this love. Following a color scheme or theme helps tie together an entire event and gives your guests a true experience.
- Brainstorm creative hostess gifts: If you are invited to someone's home for a dinner or party, then you should always bring a hostess gift, even if you're just going to your mother-in-law's. I usually default to a nice candle or bottle of wine, but it's time to think outside of the box. Currently, I'm obsessed with this pineapple champagne bottle idea and really want someone to invite me over ASAP so I can make it.
- Learn more about beer and wine: I am not a big drinker, mainly because my alcohol tolerance is embarrassingly low. This means that I'm pretty inexperienced when it comes to ordering any kind of drink at a bar, especially beer and wine. My friends will discourse on the differences in types of beers, which local breweries are the best and their favorite seasonal flavors. I just sit back and nod or try to make up an opinion based on context. In order to be a better hostess and social butterfly this year, I need to up my drinking knowledge, and fast.
- Always RSVP: This is my biggest pet peeve. Even though I always make sure to RSVP, it doesn't hurt to keep it as one of my main etiquette goals. If someone takes the time to invite you to an event, then you better RSVP, and by the due date. It's a simple task. Bonus tip: if you RSVP 'no' to an event, don't just show up without letting the hostess know! She probably planned for a certain number, and you will just be throwing that out of whack.
The main color of our engagement part was pale pink, so naturally the whole fam dressed to match the color scheme
Manners Moral: 25 may not seem very old, but it's a huge turning point for me. I want to make sure that moving forward I master these simple etiquette rules, and hopefully a few more.